I have asked the same question in myLot.com and I am not surprised at all that a few had bothered to answer the question. You know how it is in paid-to-post sites, people will be hogging for your posts like hungry dogs fighting over a bone.
But I didn’t quite expect that someone would actually be saying the most sensible thing in a forum where every reply spells money that really got me to thinking.
The friend was right ( though we were not properly introduced in the virtual world, I take she is a new-found friend) about that there are things we don’t like about our family and that we should find a way to reconnect to that person (the family member we hate). To do just that is the right thing to do and I know I should do it.
Only that I don’t feel like reaching out first when I am ill-stricken with the belief that I was the one who had been wronged.
Isn’t that torture? Phoning your transgressor, saying you are sorry for what happened and what would that get you? The wrongdoer will all the more think highly and mightily about himself. There would be no remorse, humility and realization on his part; only contempt.
There is not an issue of inability to forgive. The point is how could forgiveness flourish in the absense of apology through both words and in deeds. When love and hate collides, you become entangled in your own personal hell.
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